Netipotcalypse: A Collaborative Novel

I’m going to preface this review by saying how excited I was to see this was a collaborative novel! I ran Literary Society my last two years of high school, and we did exquisite corpses; it was so much fun, and this has made me realize how much I miss being part of something like that.

I debated on how to write my review, and I finally settled on this: s’not my usual review style, but s’not your usual type of book! So enjoy my observations from this wild, unhinged ride!

Mike Salt and MJ Mars win the award for actually managing to gross me out. The sheer amount of hawk tuahing “thick, green, chunky globs” of snot in people’s mouths in Mike’s chapter; sir, those actions should be outlawed! I’m still green just thinking about it. And MJ, thanks for the “festering and oozing” case of trypophobia I now have. This episode of Gee, Will I Fit There? with special guest, Dangly Knob Worms, has taught me some very important lessons…

Edmund and Jay must be auditioning for new episodes of Sex Sent Me to the ER: Questionable Insertions While on the Toilet and It’s Coming Out WHERE??? And, Andrew, the absolute heinous amount of snot produced in your chapter….someone best put me out of my misery if I ever come close to producing that.

In conclusion, Christopher is an absolute delight and Jyl wins for best song reference (who doesn’t love a hearty rendition of Let the Bodies Hit the Floor?) and movie reference (sorry, Ben, as good as Married…With Children is, it can’t beat Die Hard).

This book is an absolute must read! I had the time of my life reading it, and I SURVIVED THE NETIPOCALYPSE!!! Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go deep clean my crockpot, pour one out for Derek (a true Chad among men), and purchase a lifetime supply of hazmat suits and industrial grade sanitizing spray.

Snotpocalypse, ahoy! The power of Clorox repels you!